Friday, November 25, 2011

Family Changes

For a while now, I have been wanting to share some parts of my life that are changing. Unfortunately, I can't share about all the changes today, but I can start by sharing one part.

Since before Derrick & I got married, I knew that I wanted a houseful of kids. Growing up as an only child with no cousins close by makes for a lonely time. I have always loved kids & knew that I wanted to do something to help those who need it. Once Derrick & I moved back to Davenport & got settled, we decided to become foster parents. We had seen our Pastor & his wife foster lots of children during their time at our church (mostly teenage girls - yikes!) & we saw the difference they were making in their lives. We wanted to do the same. We went through the classes & the home study & once we were approved, 2 little boys were placed in our home. About the same time, we found out I was pregnant with Dylan.

B (age 7) & J (age 6) stayed with us about 3 months. They were rowdy & wild & caused all sorts of trouble. But they were also sweet, loving & adorable. They left us in August of 2008 & have since been adopted by an awesome family who loves them despite all their difficulties. They are doing fantastic & are growing into wonderful young men.

After Dylan was born so early, we took about a year off from fostering. We did some respite care, but that was about it. We thought about letting our licence expire, but ultimately decided to renew it. Not long after we renewed, we were blessed with Baby Kota in April 2009. He was a sweet little guy & we thought he might be an adoption placement, but his parents got it together (& we are so proud of them!) & he was able to go home to them in July 2009. He now lives with his dad & is doing great!

Following him, D (age 2) came to live with us. He had some severe disabilities & lots of medical needs that we couldn't handle, so he was only with us for 10 days. We still believe that the placement worker either didn't know the extent of his disabilities or she purposefully didn't tell us all of them in order to have somewhere to place him. We felt bad that we had agreed to take him & then had to have him moved so quickly, but I think that never would have happened if she had given us the whole story from the start.

Most recently we have baby A. He came to us in April 2011 at 3 months old with some delays & has been increasingly improving since. He has some brain damage that may or may not repair itself, but he is making big strides. We were hoping that he's situation would be resolved so he could go home soon, but I am not sure if that is going to happen too quickly.

Here is where the change comes in: For several reason, Derrick & I have decided not to renew our foster licence this year. More details will be shared about the reasons at a later time, but no, we are not getting divorced & no, I am not pregnant. We are excited to just be our little family of 3 again for a while, but it will be sad to not have those extra sweet little faces around the house. This week we started weeding through our foster care clothing. What to save, what to sell, what to give away. We started talking about taking down the crib & putting away the baby items. While I know this is the right move for our family, it is still hard to be closing that chapter of our lives.

Baby A will continue to live with us until mid to late December, then he will be moving, either to a family member or to another foster home. He has been with us for 7 months - the longest of any foster child we have had - so we are hoping to still be able to be in contact with him.

We know foster parents are very much needed in our area & we have been BLESSED by the joy these kids have brought into our lives. We may come back to fostering in the future, but right now we are feeling a release from that part of our lives. If you are interested in fostering & live in the Iowa Quad Cities, let me know & I can get you more info. Otherwise, www.iakids.org has a lot of good information about becoming a foster parent. Sometimes fostering is the most difficult thing in the world...but it is still a huge blessing! We are thankful for the time God gave us in that ministry & are excited to see where He is taking us next!